"Life on life's terms." Often wondering to myself early in recovery. What does that even mean, and why weren't the terms the same for everyone? Nothing could have prepared me for "Life on life's terms." Not treatment, not a sponsor, nor could meetings.The thoughts I would encounter and defeat. The feelings that would consume my every fiber, both good and bad. The sadness, pain, and resentment I would feel when I got the news my friend Jessiyka had overdosed and died, early on in my recovery. The joy, happiness, and serenity I would feel listening to my husband and son laugh, making "real" friendships, and living life to the fullest. Although, "Life on life's terms" used to be a scary thought, thinking back on the past, so was life. There was no life, and all I had was the terms of my drugs and alcohol. Now, I would be lying if I said life was easy, but at least I have a life. It's terms are hard at times, but I would not trade the feelings of satisfaction and growth I obtain by making it through situations by living "Life on life's terms".